A Prisoner in my own mind

I made this five months after my mother passed, when I was knee-deep in the grief process. It was my first fall dealing with seasonal depression since she passed, and I was really struggling to come to terms with her death. The whole thing felt surreal. I wanted to be anywhere except where I was.

I was self-destructing in a lot of ways, and I couldn't stop the spiral. It was affecting every single part of my life. I was doing my best to put on a brave face, but this was the first time I couldn't keep up the facade of people pleasing. My world was shattered, and I didn't have the energy to worry about how I showed up for anyone else.

I was smoking more weed than I ever had, just feeling empty inside. My mind was in an incredibly dark place, and I kept finding myself in negative feedback loops. I truly felt like a prisoner in my own mind.